Tuesday, July 01, 2008
What irks most
(I realise that I complain all. the. time. but I'll live longer that way.)
I shan't Ctrl+C+V what most (Singaporean) teens list under their "hatezx" list, i.e. "bimbos... liars... backstabbers... hypocrites...". Yes, the above named can be annoying. But what really annoys me (and probably most people) is the rare but unique few who stab you with a butter knife.
Now, now, what's with the incomprehensible metaphors, you may ask. By "stab you with a butter knife" I mean attacking you in the most seemingly harmless way.
A butter knife is a knife, and everyone knows knives are never NOT dangerous. That's why kids don't find their action figurines armed with stainless steel bread slicers-cum-margarine spreaders. It is also why Mattel or Tomy won't make Cutlery Hour (get the red fork out of the... jam before the other spoons devour it!)... or Stab-Me Elmo (Spread-Butter-All-Over-Me Elmo, for that matter).
When you stab someone with a butter knife, that person gets hurt for sure. (That is, only if he/she does not happen to be a master in martial arts and has the ability to disarm you in one swift continuous motion, followed by a lethal dropkick.)
If you plan to pass off an offensive comment, why try to make it sound pleasant?
Why bother smiling, when your teeth are sharpened and your canines are waiting to slice flesh?
I shan't Ctrl+C+V what most (Singaporean) teens list under their "hatezx" list, i.e. "bimbos... liars... backstabbers... hypocrites...". Yes, the above named can be annoying. But what really annoys me (and probably most people) is the rare but unique few who stab you with a butter knife.
Now, now, what's with the incomprehensible metaphors, you may ask. By "stab you with a butter knife" I mean attacking you in the most seemingly harmless way.
A butter knife is a knife, and everyone knows knives are never NOT dangerous. That's why kids don't find their action figurines armed with stainless steel bread slicers-cum-margarine spreaders. It is also why Mattel or Tomy won't make Cutlery Hour (get the red fork out of the... jam before the other spoons devour it!)... or Stab-Me Elmo (Spread-Butter-All-Over-Me Elmo, for that matter).
When you stab someone with a butter knife, that person gets hurt for sure. (That is, only if he/she does not happen to be a master in martial arts and has the ability to disarm you in one swift continuous motion, followed by a lethal dropkick.)
If you plan to pass off an offensive comment, why try to make it sound pleasant?
Why bother smiling, when your teeth are sharpened and your canines are waiting to slice flesh?
# posted at 10:59 PM
